Laumer, Keith The World Shuffler

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Swinehild had placed there
"A miracle! Any miracle! But make it fast!"
A terrific blow smashed at O'Leary; out of the darkness he went spinning end over end
into fire-shot darkness filled with shatterings and smashing and screams. Then blackness
closed in like a filled grave.
"It was a miracle," a voice that Lafayette remembered from another lifetime, ages
before, was saying. "As I reconstruct events, he fell from the roof, struck the flagpole,
and was catapulted back up and through the window, to land squarely atop his Highness,
who was rushing to discover the source of the curious sounds outside."
"Give him air," another voice snapped.
Lafayette found his eyes open, looking up at the frowning visage of Lorenzo,
somewhat bruised but as truculent as ever.
"You could at least have let me in on your plan," the other O'Leary said. "I was getting
worried there at the last, just before you arrived."
"You . . . you were marvelous, sir," a sweet voice murmured. With an effort like
pushing boulders, Lafayette shifted his eyes, was looking into the smiling face of Daphne
or Lady Andragorre, he corrected himself with a pang of homesickness.
"You . . . really don't know me, do you?" O'Leary managed to chirp weakly.
"You're wondrous like one I know well, yclept Lancelot," the lady said softly. "I ween
'twas you I saw from my coach as I rode forth to my tryst in the forest. But no, fair sir.
We are strangers. . . and I am all the more in your debt."
"As am I," another voice spoke up. A man stood beside Lady Andragorre, his arm
familiarly around her girlish waist. He wore a short, trimmed beard and a curling
moustache under a floppy hat. "Methought I'd languish till doomsday in his Grace's
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dungeons until you arrived to spring me." He studied Lafayette's face, frowning.
"Though I cannot for my life see this fancied resemblance of which my bride prates."
"Face it, Lafayette," Lorenzo spoke up. "This character's in on the ground floor. He
belongs here in Melange, it seems. He used to be duke, before Krupkin came along and
stuck Rodolpho up in his place. Now he's in charge again, and Krupkin's in the dungeon.
And the lady isn't Beverly after all. She finally convinced me." He sighed. "So I guess
we lose out."
"Swinehild," Lafayette muttered, and managed to sit up. "Is she all right?"
"I'm here and in the pink, thanks to you, Lafe," the former barmaid cried, elbowing a
nervous-looking medico aside. "Gee, sugar, you look terrible." She smiled down at him,
radiant in her court costume.
"I just want to talk to her!" a shrill male voice was yelling. in the background. A
ruffled figure in tight silks thrust through the circle, shot Lafayette a hot look,
confronted Lady Andragorre.
"What's this all about, Eronne? Who's this bewhiskered Don Juan who's fingering your
hipbone? And where did you get that get-up? What is this place? What's going on "
"Hold it, chum," Lorenzo said, taking the stranger's elbow. "This is going to take a
little explaining, but it seems we're all in the same boat "
"Get lost, junior; who asked you to meddle?" The newcomer jerked his sleeve free.
"Well, what about it, Eronne?" he addressed Lady Andragorre. "You act as if you'd never
seen me before! It's me, Lothario O'Leary, your intended, remember?"
"The lady's name is Andragorre," the moustached Duke Lancelot spoke up harshly.
"And she happens to be my intended, not yours!"
"Oh, yeah?"
"Absolutely! Wouldst dispute me?"
As peacemakers moved in to soothe the ruffled disputants, Lafayette rose unsteadily,
and, supported by Swinehild, tottered away.
"I have to get out of here," he said. "Look, Swinehild I've had a stroke of luck at last.
I've recovered my ability to manipulate the cosmic energies so I'm going home, where I
belong. And I wonder well, I have Daphne waiting for me, so I don't want you to
misunderstand my motives but wouldn't you like to come with me? I can pass you off
as a long-lost cousin of Adoranne's, and with a little tutoring in how to walk and talk, you
can soon fit right in "
"Gee, Lafe you really gotta go?"
"Certainly! But as I said, you may come too. So if you're ready "
"Uh, say, excuse me, ma'am," a deep voice said hesitantly. "Begging your ladyship's
pardon, but I was looking for I mean, I hear tell my, er, wife what I mean to say is, I
plan to get around to marrying her as soon as ..."
"Hulk!" Swinehild cried. "You come looking for me! You must care!"
"Swinehild?" Hulk quavered incredulously. "H-holy jumping Georgie Jessel
you're you're plumb beautiful!"
"Hmmmphh," Lafayette said as the pair moved off, grabbing at each other. He
managed to work his way across the room unnoticed, slipped out into a small cloakroom
off the grand ballroom.
"Home," he said, patting his pockets. "Home sweet home . . ." He frowned, patted his
pockets again, in turn. "Damn! I've lost the salami . . . must have dropped it somewhere
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between the flagstaff and Goruble's head." He re-emerged, encountered Lorenzo.
"There you are!" his double exclaimed. "Look here, Lafayette we have to talk!
Maybe between the two of us we can summon up enough cosmic power to get back
where we belong! I'm going crackers watching Duke Lancelot squeeze Andragorre "
"Just help me find my salami," Lafayette countered. "Then I'll see what I can do."
"Food, at a time like this?" But he followed as Lafayette led the way down into the
courtyard directly below the scene of his miraculous coup of an hour before.
"It should be lying around here someplace ..."
"For heaven's sake, why not go to the kitchen?"
"Look, Lorenzo, I know it sounds silly, but this salami is vital to my psychic-energy-
harnessing. Don't ask me why ask a bureaucrat named Pratwick." [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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